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Phoenix

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She furiously scribbles down the words of deception. “Pathetic”, she murmers under her breath.
She’s frustrated, she always is. Lost in her self conjured realm of a black hole containing nothing but baseless and pointless rants. She feeds on the self pity that disgusts her.
“Move on, you drag” she grumbles like a mumbling thunder. Rage is all she can think of. A rage that she can not explain, neither it’s origin, nor it’s destination.
It is a façade, she knows it. After all, she hates cracking open her chest to show off the bloody heart pumping in it’s battered form. Plunging into negativity is always something she does, often and fondly. It was sick, maybe psychotic. But she needs to put a finger on the throbbing pain. She can’t, unless it can be percieve through her senses.
Sweet surrender, it is. Her vanity swells up to over confidence. She is so sure that she can rise from her ashes. Before that, she has to proceed with her own funeral, burn her own dead body and then reserruct from the dust and smoke that once was her flesh and blood.
“How Emily Dickinson-ish of me”, she snickers.
She slowly raises her bloodshot gaze. The dying amber of the dusk lit a fire in her eyes accompanied by the twitch of her lips that formed a grin.

Procrastinating Wrath

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Meet me some other day, any day, but not today.
For that day, I shall tear you down to pieces till you become irrepairable and no stitch can hold your scattered pieces together.But that day, is not today.
For today, I am broken.

Meet me some other day, any day, but not today.
For that day, I shall play your game by your rules. Yes, that dirty little game that you’re so proud of. Then, I shall win over and over again until you are defeated and I am unbeatable.

But that day, is not today.
For today, I am defeated.

Meet me some other day, any day, but not today.
For that day, I will use your words agains you and trap you in a maze which will lead you no where to fade away in nothingness.

But that day, is not today.
For today, I am lost.

Meet me some other day, any day, but not today.
For that day, I shall snatch your pride, demolish your vanity, demoralize your values and strip you down to your bare, vulnerable, unprotected soul. That day, you and I shall witness the secret hidden inside you.

But that day, is not today.
For today, my soul seeks shelter.

Meet me some other day, any day but just not today.
And on that day, be prepared. For I shall come prepared to chant the encantations and curses that bind us.
That day, be prepared, for you shall become me and I shall become you.

Be prepared and meet me some day. Any other day, but not today.

 

Abyss; the Second

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Intermittent shadows
Harmless tornados
Fade away
In the rusty sunrise
As the wind breezes
Blow away
Residues of time
Years upon years
Dance away

She sneaks behind me
And as she giggles
Whispers in my ear
The most beautiful words
Of an unknown language
Dispersing in the air
As I catch at them
“The answer lies within”
Imprinted frowns, replaced
Steady heartbeat gains pace
Serenity spreads it’s wings
An unknown song it sings

 

Abyss; the First

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In solitude, I dwell
With damnation of Hell
Images; black and white
Mere visions of plight
Scattered self of a broken mirror
I fall, I deplore
Blank gazes, vacant smiles
As I lie on the floor

Hollow laughter’s echoing
In these shadows, fading.
Had enough of pain?
And yet, nothing to gain.

Amused or confused?
A battle within
Forgiving, not forgetting
A virtue or a sin?

Bliss

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Through her tinted glasses
She gaped at the fading green
The crawling yellow, the infecting brown
Spreading across
The blurs of nature
And she questions
“Such a world exists?”
Admist the grey masses of steel
The colorful layers
On the cemented walls
Had never given her
What she got, standing
Under the azure
Blotched with white
Inhaling the air, so fresh
That her existence
Revived with redemption