Monthly Archives: February 2015

A Note on the Kitchen Counter

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I’m done, done, done! I seriously cannot do this anymore. My sanity is at the verge of combustion, bursting into burning orbs. Fragments of an existence that was once whole, once unified and once formed me, shall scatter into a void of some vast universe.

I’m gonna be gone, gone, gone… then what will you do? Nothing much can be done after that, honey. You’ll stay the same. Shed a tear or two, eh? Maybe. Please do so, after all you cared for me once upon a dream, right? Maybe an escaped gasp and bewilderment shall overcome you Maybe more than that but then what will you do? Will you look up at the stars and reach out for them in a failed attempt to grasp what is left of me? Trust me, my love. I am trying, trying, trying. So hard to fit into this mirage of unified humans submitting to conformity. But I find it terribly difficult to collect what is remaining of my energy to inhale/exhale for a purpose dictated by an imbecile majority. Gosh, these people make me puke. Ew, people. Ew, ew, ew! Humans think so highly of themselves that they consider every action of theirs justified.

Baby, I’m holding back, back, back. It’s like I’m falling into a black hole that’ll take me back in time. Retarded time and reversed tread. I have to control myself. I am not allowed to say what I think and do what I want. So here I am on this remote island gazing at this wondrous world where these humans are acting like animals and animals are being trained to act like humans. It’s a circus. Everyone’s putting up a show and strip teasing. Lust keeps oozing from the dribbling mouths of these hyenas. It’s like the uncontrollable wildness you see in the eyes of a madman, unsettling and perturbed. I am fighting, fighting, fighting. This is a war against my own self. Even if I win, I lose. I am struggling to adjust this veil that conceals my thoughts that I have from the thoughts I should have. Shush, shush! No one should know what I think of. Those silly thoughts shall lead to my execution! I let them control my life but hell no they won’t control my death.

But fuck it! I’m done, done, done. No one can save me. No one! No one!

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The Difference

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Paranoia exerting
suppressing the ability
to think straight
There’s a time bomb
ticking and beeping
At the back of your head
A racing mind
stumbling then running
for miles
with no destination
No pause, no comma
An inconsequential sentence
Converted paragraph
Divergent and beguiled
Misguided delusion
forming and deforming
Declared ugliness; useless
But why?
Does not abnormality
evolve the normal?
Do not the noble
rise from the ordinary?
Why does eccentricity
a mere brush stroke of madness
make the great
any less (or more) of a human?
One mistake
tripping and falling
a cardinal sin
Mortal damnation
Execution! Execution!
Judgments are final
Ever changing yet objective
Forged subjectivity
It is a bias
to claim not to be biased.